New Year, New You!

Aww, New Year's Eve....I love it, much like I love September and the beginning of school, for its opportunity of reflection, change, and optimism. So in honour of that spirit, I decided to write a blog and share some of my resolutions for the coming year!

1. Apparently last year I resolved to be more like The Fonz (read about it here). I am most certain I was not Fonz like at all this year, so my first resolution is to make better resolutions.

2.  To always remember where I park in parking lots. Seriously. I just came back from Home Depot, and when I walked out of the store, it was as if an alien mothership just randomly dropped me off somewhere. I had no recollection of parking there AT ALL. So that seems like a logical and helpful resolution.

Dude, where's my car??

3. Go on the Ballerina Diet. What is the Ballerina Diet, you ask? Well, the other day Dani and I went to see The Nutcracker. And obviously I was inspired by the incredible physical build and dedication of the ballerinas. So, I told Droid I was going to become a ballerina (pretty sure that is possible at the age of 34). He replied that I can't, because I am too "big".  More specifically, he said I have too much of a "buh-donk-a-donk". (Does he really think giving it a name that sounds like Donkey Kong is going to make me less likely to scratch his eyes out??) Now, my life mission is to prove Droid wrong whenever possible, so now I have to go on the ballerina diet and lose my "buh-donk-a-donk", because Droid said that is impossible, and he may be right because I have had it all my life no matter what my weight/size, but I can't let him be right so I have to lose it! (Yes that run on sentence was on purpose) And hence, the Ballerina Diet is born. But first I have to eat all of the crap I have in the house. Today.

Why hello there, future Brenda!

4. Last, but not least. To be more negative. To be more pessimistic. I have a real problem with saying yes to everything, and actually thinking it is possible for me to do everything, and be nice to everyone (Droid doesn't count) and it is getting me into trouble lately. Seriously, I don't even want to delete friends from Facebook that I don't talk to, or haven't seen in 20+ years because I don't want to hurt their feelings. And who am I to say they are unworthy of being my "friend". Ugh- not anymore! Plus, I have a problem with internalizing my stress and then I break out in hives. My new motto is "Hive Free for 2012!"

So, I think ending this post on that extremely grouchy and negative note shows I am well on my way! One last thing....

HAPPY NEW YEAR! MAY 2012 BE THE BOMB FOR ALL OF YOU! (but not a real bomb since the world is supposedly going to end this year. I am not using foreshadowing here, just slang)

Am I missing something?

A few weeks ago, I was doing some holiday shopping. I was in a higher end store because I was buying a very important gift. For myself. This was the kind of store where the person helping you wants to know your name so they can talk to you like you are BFFs for life. Then you will totally buy that gift because you don't want to hurt your Bff's feelings right?!! Plus it makes you feel important (not gonna lie, it kinda worked on me. A lot. I bought two things).

So, I told this very helpful, very friendly lady my name. Brenda. (Ps. She asked my name, I didn't just tell her so she could commence making me feel important). As she continued to show me more things that I would totally love, she continued to use my name. Debbie. 

Yep. Debbie. She must have called me Debbie 100 times. I just kept answering like I really was Debbie. Now, I know what you're thinking, "Big whoop, why didn't you just correct her? Why are you blogging about this? Are you that desperate for a blog idea since you haven't blogged since Halloween?" But the truth is, I am blogging about this moment because it is part of a big, strange phenomenon that I have been experiencing my whole life. People always call me Debbie! My whole life! In a variety of contexts and situations! It really is getting strange, and I am really starting to wonder about the frequency of this happening and why...here are some of the possible reasons I have been contemplating...

1. My mom's name is Debbie so maybe people are confused. (This one gets thrown out the window immediately because many people this happens with don't know my mom. Unless.....there is a fight club thing happening here and I really am my mom too?!!!)

2. I majorly look like a Debbie and my parents were the only ones that didn't realize that. 

3. I have a language disorder and whenever I say the word Brenda, it comes out Debbie. 

4. I have a language disorder and whenever other people say the word Brenda, I hear Debbie. 

5. I was Debbie in a past life and all the people that call me Debbie are psychics that get confused.  

That's all I got so far. 

To tell the truth, it got a little awkward at the end of my shopping experience. When I went to pay, my Bff told the cashier that my name was Debbie. Then I had to explain when my credit card clearly did not say Debbie on it. Then she called the credit card company to make sure my card hadn't been stolen. Then I didn't feel very important anymore. 

*Disclaimer* Although a large number of Kindergarten students call me Mr. Lemonade, I do not get confused or concerned that I may have gender identity issues or that I am yellow. Because that scenario seems to only occur within a certain population I deduct that issue may lie with the population.

*edited to say that maybe they are just calling me sour??*